Christmas

One of the benefits of staying where I am in Alexandria, VA with my friend is that he is a book addict.  His collection of over 5,000 books gives me plenty of variety in reading material.  Just before Christmas I found an interesting title and decided to enjoy it during the season...The Battle for Christmas.  It was written by a Jewish professor of history from MA.  Very interesting.

Where I pastored I used to ask my congregation "Why do we have Sunday School?"  Believe it or not, Jesus didn't have perfect attendance at Sunday School.  In fact, it didn't even exist until about 175 years ago.  If we are supposed to be living in a dynamic life daily with the Holy Spirit, what would He be suggesting to us is the 2012 version of Sunday School?  Alas, that is for another blog.

Good pastor that I am with leanings toward being a prophet I ask you, "What are the origins of Christmas and why do we celebrate that holiday today as we do?"  Consider this stepping on your toes.

You might reply, "Jesus is the reason for the season."  Ummm, let's look at that carefully.  First thing, Jesus probably wasn't born around late December.  In fact, it was probably earlier in the year, maybe sometime before October.  Why?  Because the shepherds wouldn't be out in their fields tending their flocks in late December.  It was too dang cold.  Oops!  Where did all this hoopla come from in late December?

Christmas celebration as we know it today had its roots in Europe but let's look at the history from the 1600's in America just to keep it short (400 years short).  Christmas celebration in late December actually was banned in early New England.  That's because it was a time of intense rowdiness, drunkenness and free sex.  Yes, in New England in the 1600's.  In fact, the birth rate climbed pointedly in September and early October.

It was the end of the harvest when there was an abundance of food and drink.  A time to relax and let it all hang out.  Certainly not the type of celebration that would focus on the birth of Christ.

Without giving away the whole book, let's just say that even in the 1700 and 1800's there was a move to clean up the holiday, de-liquor it and rein in the rowdy gangs of young men and women.  Santa Claus got brought into the picture first as St Nicholas.  But he was too "bishopy", which the real St Nicholas was.  So he morphed into a jolly, old man made famous by the 1800's story of the night before Christmas.

And yes, back then, the commercialization even got its start.  It got promoted as a great time to give gifts by the merchants who wanted to survive (and there is a history to that that doesn't tie directly to the Wise Men).  The Christmas tree got added, children got included.  But so were the servants and slaves as important parts of feeling good about treating those fairly who had been taken advantage of the rest of the year.

Well, now that I have burst your bubble, where do we go from here?  As followers of Christ in 2012 and beyond how do we refocus our celebration on the birth of Christ?  As the prophetic voice of a new Kingdom, how do we speak into our culture and put the focus where it belongs? 

The argument could be made that we should continue to celebrate the real reason for celebration...the birth of Christ...observing it in the more likely time it actually happened.  Problem is our holiday (read holy day) wouldn't be sanctioned with a day off by our bosses.  People might even look at us as weird (remember the prophet going through the streets naked?  Or wearing an ox yoke?).  We might even be celebrating it in August.

Or we could start by doing Christmas differently during the season that everyone is focused on it.  Or we could not do Christmas at all.  (Discuss this in your small groups or maybe at Starbucks)  Should we focus all our goodwill (and that is rooted in the 1600's way of doing Christmas) just during the latter few weeks of the year?  Or as Christ's family should we be generous year round in His name?  How are we as followers of Christ to interpret His kingdom for those who need to hear the Good News?  Do we live like Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde, splitting our personalities between acting righteous during Christmas and acting like...(can't think of a good word here that won't offend) the rest of the year?  Isn't it time for us to celebrate Christ's birth year round?

Let's try it this year.  De-emphasize Christmas during the latter part of the year and heavily emphasize it the rest of the year in the way we treat others, the way we spend our money, the way we do our jobs and the way we relate to the world.  We're supposed to be trend setters and that's because we are followers of Christ and not the world.  Can we start a new trend that has roots beyond the 1600's back to a little town in Bethlehem?

Reality Shows

If the people don't praise God the rocks will cry out.

I know I sound like a broken record sometimes but I believe it is the message that God has given me to proclaim.  Something is missing in the way we do church today versus what God intended.  I read about it this week in a blog.  Rather than having the government do all the supporting of the widows and orphans its supposed to be the church's job.

So what happens when we aren't being the church the way God intended it to be?  Does He remain silent?  Does He go into hibernation and disappear for a season or twenty?

The rocks cry out.

John Eldredge first gave me the idea that is the core of what I'm going to say.  When the church quit showing the world what our God was like, Hollywood took up the mantel.  Or better said, God used even carnal Hollywood to spread His message in the world.  When we see epic films like Braveheart we see depicted the sacrificial life of Christ in the closing scenes of William Wallace's life.  When we see the epic battles of good and evil in J R R Toilken's Lord of the Rings on the screen we get a glimpse of what is going on in the heavenlies....and what is also going on in the world we are a part of.  It is unseen to many of us.

I had a thought this afternoon while watching a trailer for a new reality show about a super nanny.  I only saw it once so I don't remember the real name of the show.  But she enters a home in which abuse is taking place.  She demonstrates to the father with a backpack of rocks the damage that is being done when the father is verbally abusing his son.  Trying to carry the backpack full of rocks is hard and it is an object lesson used by the nanny to show the father what his criticism is doing to the son.  The father ends up in tears.  He is touching the pain he feels in his heart...probably because of the absence of a father figure to show him the Father.

You've probably also seen the shows on hoarding.  The family has their possessions which literally took over their lives while in the home scattered all over the front lawn of the house.  There as they attempt to sort out what they are going to keep and what they are going to throw away they begin to realize how their things have literally taken their lives away.  The are brought to the place where they are talking about issues they have avoided for years.  They are talking about the real impact of the piles of stuff.  The elephant in the middle of the living room is exposed.

There is weeping.  There is a seeing into their hearts.  There is a connection that comes between family members that has been missing.

Why in hell (get offended if you wish) is that the "ministry" of the reality shows?  Why isn't the church doing that very thing for the lives of those who warm their pews (or chairs) every Sunday morning?  Why are we not setting people's lives free from the broken hearts they live with daily?  Those broken hearts keep them from connecting with each other even when they live lives within inches of each other every day.

I shared something in a post with one of my FB friends this week.  When our hearts have been hurt we recoil.  We close off our hearts for further hurt by detaching ourselves from each other.  The only problem is that we give up the chance of ever experiencing intimacy again.

We lash out at those closest to us with our pain like the father in the reality show toward his son.  His burden that he has been carrying for many years is being transferred to his son.  And his son has every possibility of transferring that to his son (or daughter).

And the hoarder is trying to fill the void in his/her heart by surrounding themselves with things, things and more things.

I had a conversation with my dearest male friend this week before he went into open heart surgery.  He said he wasn't sure how much of the bill was going to be covered by his insurance, Medicare and that he may even have to literally sell his farm to have life.

My response to him was that who he is as a person is worth the farm...literally and figuratively.

When are we going to give up playing church and start being the church?  When are we going to stop investing in things that moth and rust corrupts and get back to investing in real lives...lives that are hurting?  Lives that don't know what a real relationship is like?  Do we have to let the reality shows tell us what the church should be doing to rescue those with broken hearts (Us!) or is it time for us to BE the church?

"The Spirit of the sovereign Lord is upon me because He has anointed me to preach Good News.  He has sent me to bind up the broken-hearted.  He has sent me to set the captives free."

Character

Character isn't something you hear much about today.  We've developed into a relativistic society where the "absolutes" don't exist any more.  If it works for you, do it.  If nobody is watching, you'll probably get by with it. 

Guilt is more about whether you get caught or not, not whether what you did was wrong or right, broke a moral code or God's law.

The issue of character arises when something like what has happened to the candidate Cain, CEO of Godfather's Pizza makes the news.  He was accused several times of sexual harassment and most recently he made the scene because he was accused of having a 13 year affair with someone.  John Edwards was having an affair and fathering a child with someone other than his wife as he ran for president.

Back when Weiner was having his troubles with sending pictures to a woman that wasn't his wife, the subject came up at the office.  One of my colleagues made the comment that it shouldn't matter what he did in his private life as long as it didn't interfere with his public service.

I challenged that thought.  You see, we aren't able to separate our private and public lives.  We think we can...as long as someone doesn't find out what we're really like.  If we don't get caught, what does it matter?

Its a matter of character.  I heard a simple definition of character when I was a kid.  I would make it a deeper thing than this but it's a good place to get started.  Character is what you act out of when no one is watching.  It is your core ethical value.  It is based in the fact that as a follower of Christ we are held accountable to Him for our actions...whether we get caught or not by someone else.  The motivation for our behavior isn't the fear of getting caught or even the fear of God's punishment.  The thrust of our behavior comes from the relationship we have with the Father who sees all anyway.  We act in a way that pleases Him because we love Him and He loves us.

If the core of someone's ethics allows them to violate their sacred marriage covenant can they adequately govern or lead anyway?  I don't think so.  We are our character.  Our character is the core of who we are.  We lead and make decisions out of our character.  What is to stop someone who will violate their marriage vows from doing something else illegal?  Really, nothing.  Even the fear of getting caught can't keep people from behaving immorally.

If I say that I am for family values publicly and then violate the vows of a core family what does that say about me?  It says that I am a person without integrity.  I am operating out of duplicity.  I am saying one thing and doing another.  I am speaking out of both sides of my mouth.  My character is not solid and my moral values are up for grabs at any moment depending on the situation.

It is time for us as followers of Christ to be people of character and integrity.  It is time for us to live like we talk.  It is time for us to model what singleness of mind and heart look like.  If I say that I support family values then I should live a life that demonstrates that I take that seriously.  If I say that I love my wife or husband then I should act like that in public and private.  Not put on an act, but be integrated.  If I say I uphold the law then I should uphold ALL of the law, not just the parts that are convenient, not just the parts that I can brag about keeping while leaving silent the ones that I don't uphold.

I'm ready for some leaders whose character is that of integrity.  Who live lives of integrity.  Who practice what they preach.  Who, if they say they are on the side of the poor, don't take advantage of their position to rake in thousands of dollars so that their portfolio is bigger than when they took office.  If you are for the middle and lower class, then live like us.  If you are for ending homelessness, take someone in, support them or at least talk to them on the street as if they were really a person and not just a thing begging.

I was raised to be concerned about what people think about me.  I judged my actions for many years on that basis.  Until I realized that it really didn't matter what others thought of me.  It mattered if I pleased my King.  It mattered if I brought honor or shame on His name as His follower.  I ultimately do what I do in light of His judgement on my heart and not whether it is right to me or 10,000 others.  I can't do what I do based on what others do.  I must do what I am called to do as a man of integrity who answers to a righteous judge who sees all that I say, think and do.

Corruption and sin are rampant.  But by God's grace you and I can live lives of character that model the singleness of mind, the purity of righteousness that the Father holds dear, that is part and parcel of who He is.  God is righteousness and His followers should like from that same core of being, out of the Spirit that is within us, not for the benefit of the sight of others but so that we can stand before Him and hear, "my good and faithful servant".

Outliers

I recently finished listening to a book my sister-in-law gave me on CD called Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell.  After listening to the full set of CDs I was rather discouraged until I listened to the interview at the end of the set and had an insight.

To understand my insight in context I have to tell you a little about the book.  Outliers are those things which fall outside the majority of the responses to something.  So if you were a anomaly to the rest of the statistics you would be an outlier.  Outliers give managers statistics to look at to determine if there is validity to the outlier or if it was just a fluke.

In Gladwell's book he talks about how most professional hockey players were born in the early part of the year.  That is because of the cutoff date for kids to play hockey in different leagues.  If you were born in December and not January, you would miss the cutoff date and wouldn't have the opportunities to excel in hockey as a kid growing up through the ranks of hockey clubs.  You might be a good hockey player but you wouldn't be able to take advantage of the best clubs for your age, have the opportunity to play a lot or attend the best camps.  Just the date of your birth would close some of the opportunities for you to develop.

He also used Bill Gates as an example.  He was born into a comfortable family and had a unusual opportunity to have access to a computer in 1968 for unlimited time.  It was a rare experience.  There were universities and professionals who didn't have the exposure to unlimited computer time like he had as a teenager.  Others who have excelled in the computing field were born around the same time.

The Beatles spent a number of years playing in German clubs, 8 hours a day, 7 days a week.  You have to develop skills as a musician with that much playing time.  When they hit the big time they were experienced musicians with way more practice time than most garage bands.

After listening to this book I came away rather discouraged because it left me feeling that if I wasn't born in the right time and had the right opportunities, I was just going to be average.

But the insight that came when listening to the interview at the end of the book changed all that.

Who determines when we are going to be born?  If I read the Scriptures correctly we aren't born because of the whim or decision of even our parents.  We often hear people talk about "accidents" or "surprise" pregnancies.  But the Scriptures refute that.  We are born when we are born and to whom we are born at the will of the Father.  In fact, to make it more clear He tells us in Ephesians that He thought of us before the foundations of the world.  We were not a mistake and our lives are not a random thing.  We were born when the Father wanted us to be born.

In carrying that a little farther, the Father determines what experiences we have in life.  It is He who exposes us to the opportunities He wants us to have.  In fact, even as we exercise our own free will, making decisions that thwart the Father's design on our lives, He can redeem that diversion.  He can use it for our good.

So we were born into the family the Father ordained.  The experiences we had there, even the bad ones, can shape us and draw us to the Father for redemption of those sins committed against us.  Our birth and those life experiences are not random, determined by someone else.  They are under the Father's loving control of our lives.

I had to repent this week.  I believe God got me the job I have in DC.  It didn't come because of someone else's influence or pull.  And I'm going to leave DC until the Father takes me out of there.  It's not up to someone's whim whether I stay or not.  My life is controlled by the Father.  He opens the doors and He shuts them.  Can someone or something stand in the way of God's will?  Of course.  But again, He can redeem it.  He can open another door.

God provided a place for me to live in the DC area.  The guy I am staying with and I first met in...grade school.  We were friends in high school and were active in the same church youth group.  We kept in touch with each other periodically over the years but I only saw him face-to-face once in 45 years.  Now he is providing a home for me and companionship while I have to live away from Pat.  Coincidence?  I don't think so.  His open heart to me was a part of God's provision for me after 50 years.

Our vision of the circumstances of our lives determine how we take advantage of the opportunities.  What has the Father exposed you to?  What unique experiences have you had that make you an "outlier"?  What circumstances has the Father set up just for you to fulfill His call on your life?  It's never too late to fulfill His heart's desire for you.

Banquet

One of the hardest parts of walking in a new kingdom is that the surroundings you are in only remind you of the kingdom where you physically reside.  Is that the way it's supposed to be?  I don't think so.  In fact, I know that the Father is always giving us little insights into the eternal kingdom that we are a part of.  We just need to watch for them and embrace them when they come.

Recently I was thinking about an experience I had as a kid.  I hadn't thought of it in a long time but the Holy Spirit brought it to mind to remind me that the Father is always showing us the kingdom.

I was telling someone about my parents on Fri.  My mom was one of 13 and my father was an only child.  Yes, that means conflict and lots of it.  Both of them were raised in poverty with a few different twists.  My dad actually stood in soup lines as a child during the depression.  His father had died in a mining accident when he was only 2.  So his mother, a widow with $4,000 to continue with, bought a lot and built a house.  There she raised a garden and chickens in a shed so that they had food.

My mom only got a new pair of shoes once a year.  The other day she told me how she was going to give a report in school and her mother sent her to the store to buy a new dress...with $2.  She found two for $2 and couldn't decide which one to wear.  Any way, her life was a little bit less poor than my father's.  She lived on a dairy farm.  So they had milk, eggs, chickens, a garden and plenty to eat without standing in the soup lines.

After college, my mom and dad moved away from home to Louisville, the big city, to escape the 20-25% unemployment that offered few good jobs.

Dad got steady employment for a whopping $240 per month with the phone company.  My mom pinched pennies and over the years saved money out of her grocery budget through wise spending.

Somewhere she got the idea that she was going to expose my sister and I to what she had never experienced.  Dad did the same, but in a different way.  I'll focus on mom in this blog.

With the savings from her grocery money and infrequent Christmas gifts from my father she acquired a set of china and a full set of real silverware...not stainless steel like we have had all our married life.  On summer vacations when we went through Wheeling, WV she gathered together a collection of Fenton Glass seconds.  We couldn't afford the firsts.  But it was still real crystal.

There's a difference between plain glass and crystal.  For one thing, the glasses are more delicate, break easier and certainly don't ever see the insides of a dishwasher.  And if you stir the sugar in your ice tea you can't crack the tea spoon on the side of the glass without serious consequences.  For me, death was threatened.

My mom from some place deep inside her wanted to teach both my sister and myself how to be comfortable in any setting where we might find ourselves.  In order to do that, she set the table on Sundays for dinner with the best china, the real silverware and the crystal glasses, all with a tablecloth and real napkins.  We were to be on our best manners.  Napkin on our laps, elbows off the table and no clinking the tea spoon on the crystal.

She also taught us how to ask for our food to be passed to us...politely.  She taught us how to eat with our mouths closed.  No burping, slurping or smacking of lips.  We also learned which utensil to use for which occasion.  If you've ever been to a formal banquet you know that the typical place setting has about 6-8 different utensils for the different courses of the meal.

Besides the table settings we also had some different dinner fare.  We had fried ham, pinto beans, cabbage, cornbread and other normal dishes for the rest of the week.  But on Sundays she pulled out the stops.  We had fried oysters, lobster tail and other delicacies.  Believe me, these weren't typical foods on either of their tables at home as kids.

But as I thought about that over the last couple of weeks here's the message that came to me.  When we talk about being invited to the marriage feast of the Lamb or to the Father's banqueting table what does it look like?  Based on the carry-ins we've had at our churches and with friends it probably was eaten on Styrofoam plates with clear plastic cups and throw-away utensils.  The table cloth was paper or plastic and there were few restrictions on how you were to eat or how much.  The fare was hot dog and bean casserole, pickles and jello.

So when the Father talks about us being invited to the marriage feast or banquet what image do you suppose we get?  China, linen napkins and crystal?  Probably not.  Is it any wonder that we don't look forward to that feast any more (or maybe even less) than the next church carry-in?

The Father showed me what it was going to be like.  He's going to set the table with the best china, real silverware and with un-flawed crystal.  The fare will be the richest delicacies that we can imagine (and we won't have to worry about gaining weight!  Can you say "Amen!")  He'll bring out the best wine first and serve it throughout the banquet.  We will be able to eat our fill and the company will be unparallelled. 

Isn't it time we start having meals with each other to celebrate the banquet we are all invited to that resemble more what we are going to have?  Break out the best...and invite those from the highways and biways to join us so they understand the hope that we have and what we are looking forward to.  And so that we better understand it as well.

Two to Tango

Thoughts become clear in my head sometimes as I drive along.  I'm not even aware that I am thinking or formulating anything until it comes clear and then the words begin to flow.

That happened to me on Thurs night as I was approaching home after an almost 5 hr drive in traffic getting out of DC.  It takes two to tango.

I was thinking that in relationship to my marriage to Pat.  She is enduring separation from me and me from her during this time of transition in our lives.  It is difficult but we are equally sharing the load.  My wife isn't crying like a baby and making it all about her.  It is about both of us...and so is our marriage.

As a pastor there was a time in my serving that I was dealing with 5 women who were in difficult marriage situations, in some cases leading up to divorce.  The men were absent.  With the exception of one of the husbands, none of them wanted to work with the challenges of their marriages and get help.  With the one who did want help I'm afraid to say that I didn't offer him much.  I blew that one.

I have often said that Pat and I didn't end up statistics because of the grace of God.  In His graciousness He always provided the help we needed when we cried out for it. 

But I would be remiss if I didn't mention another element of what made and continues to make it work.  That's the exercise of our wills.  We have and have had free choice in our marriage.  We have both reached crossroads in our relationship when, had we exercised our free wills, could have parted company and gone our separate ways.

However, we made a vow when we married.  For better or worse.  In sickness and health.  For richer or poorer.  I emphasize the "WE".  I didn't make that vow alone and neither did Pat.  We both made that vow and we didn't expect the other one to carry all the weight of that commitment.

When young couples ask how we have lasted so long I start with commitment.  We made the commitment to each other that we would work it out.  That's been hard.  There have been so many times that we were at our wits end.  There seemed to be no solutions or help in sorting out the conflicts we were experiencing.  We cried out to God...and we got on the phone, asked our friends and sought counsel anywhere we could look.  Until we found what God was offering.  The commitment was there.  We were going to make it work no matter what.

I wasn't always a willing participant to that commitment.  In fact, and I redden when I think of this, when Pat first suggested that we needed counseling I offered to help her because I didn't have a problem.  Yes, that is arrogance (and ignorance) at its best.  I was brought to reality when she said that I was the problem.  How's that reflect on your credentials?

So I had to yield to the fact from the one who was committed to me that I had a problem that needed some outside intervention.  I had to exercise my will and put aside my self-protection and dive into my brokenness.

That brings up another point.  We committed to communication.  That's another hard one.  I was good at communicating (or running off at the mouth).  Pat was shut down by that exercise on my part.  I had to learn to give her time to formulate her thoughts and express them to me.  That's for another blog.  We had to have a neutral zone where we could communicate safely what was really bothering us without taking offense in what was said.

Lastly, we've had to share equally in the responsibilities of our relationship.  The scales haven't always been balanced.  Sometimes I have yielded and carried the weight of our relationship while Pat was working through something.  And far more times she has carried the weight while I worked through something.  But it has evened out over the course of 40 years.

And that's where I come to with "It takes two to tango."  If you don't have a partner who is willing to work through the difficulties of your relationship is there hope?  There is always hope but the practical facts are that sometimes one of the partners in the relationship doesn't think they have a problem and refuses to get help.  There's not much you can do about that.  You can't make them face their issues.  You can't drag them to get help.  They have to exercise their own free will, lay down their selfish focus and come willingly to the table to get help.  Unfortunately, that doesn't always happen.  More often than not the struggling partner replies like I did that I didn't (and they don't) have a problem.

It comes down to this point--Do you want to make your relationship work?  If so, can you lay aside your self-preservation and admit you need some resources you don't have?  Can you yield to your partner and join the dance of working out the steps so that you don't continue to step on each other toes?

We all need grace in our relationships but we also need the exercise of our wills to make it happen.  It takes two...

Adults

I continue to see and hear about people in places of responsibility who are offended when someone challenges some of their conclusions or suggests another way of doing things.  The reaction is not spiritual, professional or any other descriptive word you might use in your expectations of interactions with adults.

That's because we aren't dealing with adults...but merely children in maturing bodies.  We are dealing with individuals who are stuck back in their selfish, me-only childhoods where they didn't receive all they were designed for.  We are dealing with older (chronologically) people who are still looking for their affirmations and value from how others treat them.  They are applying solutions to their relationships that worked with they were a child but don't fit at all in the world of adults.

You've seen it.  Pouting.  Holding on to an "offense".  Manipulation.  Wanting things "my way" and only my way.

Paul admonished the early Christians to put away childish things.  He wasn't talking about ceasing to sing songs like Jesus Loves Me.  Or getting a Thompson chain reference Bible rather than continuing to carry your picture Bible.  Or giving more than a quarter in the offering plate.  He was talking about the way we relate to others, among many other behaviors that we needed to give up.

I've seen so many people in business settings who continue to act as if they were 5 years old.  One of my colleagues that I've written about is still in a snit about something I said to affirm one of the others in the office.  He became offended when I didn't tell him what an incredible individual he was.  That was months ago and the ice still hangs on his words.  He didn't get the affirmation his heart longed for when he was a child and he is still looking for it in his business setting.  The problem is I didn't expect to have that reaction from him when I hadn't heard him say "wah, wah, wah".

As I learned many years ago you and I were designed for an unconditional love of a Father.  We were created with a need to be nurtured, comforted and contained.  Most of us didn't get that.  We were probably well fed, clothed and disciplined.  But even if we were active in church all our lives few of us were given the opportunity to examine our immaturity of emotions, our deepest needs, the hunger of our hearts.

I realize more and more every day how incredibly blessed I am to have found a place and learned to know my Father in a more intimate way so that I could have many (not all yet!) of those needs met.  I learned how willing the Father is to meet my needs.  I learned that He doesn't expect me to just read black words on a white page (the Bible) and learn to know Him.  I got to hang out with Him and others who were in His presence.

This is such a contrast to what we experience in our churches.  We mature in our physical bodies (and then they begin to break down).  We are intellectually encouraged to become depositories of Biblical knowledge (without application to our deepest needs).  We are called to "serve" others when the only motivation that we really have to do so is to get our needs met.  Much of what I see offered as Christian service is really all about the individual who is serving and not about those being served.

How do we mature in our souls?  We put aside childish things.  We forgive those who didn't give us all we needed or were designed for.  We lay down our immature ways of trying to get back at others who don't give us what we need.  We confess our sin of looking to other gods to fill the deepest cries of our hearts.  We put aside all the hindrances that stand in the way of seeing the Father clearly.

That may be for a time giving up reading the Scriptures, especially if they are a dead letter to you and your heart isn't in reading.  It may be in giving up "doing" so much Christian ministry and focusing on "being" with the Father.  It may be in looking for others...wherever they may be found...who have a heart hunger for intimacy with the Father.  Who want to grow up from their selfish needs and expectations.

Back to the guy in my office.  I could respond to his ice with ice of my own.  That sounds mature doesn't it?  No, what the Father has called me to do is to love him.  How do I love him if I am expecting him to meet my needs by affirming me?  What if he doesn't have the capacity to love me?  What if his well is dry and he is thirsty for someone to love him for who he is and not what he can do?

I can love him by not responding to him in kind.  I can continue to overlook his immaturity and try to reach the hurting individual within.  I can continue to reach out to him in spite of his rejection.  By allowing him to reject me who by God's grace won't reject him in kind he is exposed to the unconditional love of the Father that I have received.  I wouldn't have it to give if I hadn't received it.

I still have some childish ways to give up.  I want everyone to love me...but they don't.  I want everyone to treat me with respect, especially on the road...but they don't.  I have to discipline myself to reach out to the Father when I am rejected and receive from Him the unconditional love I need at that moment.  He stands ready at every moment to give us all we need...so that we can give it to others who haven't received.

Customer Service

I'm in the customer service business.  I serve the people who serve the veterans in receiving their benefits.  What I do makes a difference in how the veterans are ultimately served.  I delight in getting answer back to those who ask me questions in as fast a time as I can.  I want to delight them with my response.  Surprise them with it's speed and thoroughness. 

We are all in the customer service business.  Even if you don't serve in a traditional customer oriented business you serve customers in whatever capacity you are working or volunteering.  As followers of Christ we are  to serve those with whom we occupy this planet.

I had some experiences recently with my doctor's office that led me to remember the last time I had really good customer service.  It was in contrast to what I got from the family practice where I go for care. I got a card last weekend from my doctor's office.  It said my blood work was normal and the xrays on the knee that brings me excruciating pain on occasion was normal.  What is "normal"?  Is the pain I am experiencing normal?  Oh, by the way, I didn't have my blood drawn until the Mon after I got the card on Sat saying the blood work was normal.  I don't even know where to begin on how that is possible.

About mid week I got the chance to call the doctor's office.  When I mentioned that my knee is still extremely painful on occasion even though my xrays were "normal" I said that I wanted to get an MRI.  Well, it before asking me anything she said that I would need to come in for another appointment to have the doctor write me an order for an MRI.  Well, okay, if that's the case I can come in on Sat.  No, she replied, we don't take routine visits like that on Sat.  I work out of town all week, I said and that's the only time I can get in.  She'd have to check with the doctor.  Oh, by the way, I told her that the doctor had suggested that if the xrays were normal that he would write me an order for an MRI.  She hadn't bothered to ask me about that.  She just assumed that I would need to make another appointment.

I got some customer service.  The doctor actually called me back in about 10 minutes.  He went over my blood work that was back by then, for real, and then told me he would write me an order for an MRI.  I should call back later that day or the next to find out when it was scheduled.  Well, I got busy and made the call on Sat.

The doctor's office is open on Sat but they apparently don't work that day.  The gal who answered the phone couldn't tell me when my MRI was scheduled (and I haven't received a phone call informing me of it yet either).  She said that my doctor who ordered it wasn't in today and I'd have to call back on Mon.  Can't you tell me the schedule?  Well, do I know who the nurse was who made the call?  I didn't have a clue.  So I have to call back again Mon...when someone is working who knows what is happening.

Now let me contrast that with a call I made to my health care provider.  When they couldn't find me in the system they put me on hold and called Washington to find out where my healthcare application was.  The gal was pleasant, did all the work for me and asked me when she was done if there was anything else I needed help with.  Now, that is briefly what customer service is all about.  She was determined to make sure all my questions were answered.  She didn't suggest that I call Washington and find out what was going on.  She did it right there for me.

I felt like I mattered in the last conversation.  I didn't have to beg to have my needs met.  The effort was made by the person I called.  With the doctor's office, I was the one who had to do all the leg work.  The person on the phone didn't have the answer so I needed to call back again some time and risk getting someone else who didn't know the answer either.  I was also supposed to alter my schedule to fit their schedule.  My convenience wasn't the most important.  There's was.

What makes good customer service?  It's when the person you are dealing with takes your needs into consideration and serves them with joy and professionalism.  They aren't thinking of themselves but they are thinking of you the customer who has a need that they can meet.  How often do you run into someone who obviously is more concerned about their needs than yours?  Another way of saying that is how often to you run into someone who's job depends on serving you but it's clearly apparent they are thinking only of the inconvience you are bringing into their lives?

As followers of Christ, what should our customer service look like?  Well, to start with it should focus on the person we are serving.  That's hard to do when you are still self-centered or in so much pain yourself that you don't have any energy to serve someone else.  Is there a solution to that?  How about going to church more often, reading your Bible earlier in the morning or tithing more?  Do those work for you?

They don't work for me.  What has helped me get my focus off myself is the unconditional love I have received from my Father.  He loves me and responds to my every need.  When I came to Him broken and admitting my woundedness and self-centeredness, He responded with loving care, healing my heart and pouring into me the oil I needed to soothe my wounded heart.  As I have received from Him, I have the capacity to love others more than myself and to be ready to serve them when they are only focused on their pain and their needs.

You can't learn that kind of customer service in a seminar.  It has to be in the presence of the One who loves us abundantly.  Have you received that?  Have you experienced the deep love of Someone who is looking out for your needs and your best interests?  When and if you have, you are able to give to others what you have received yourself.  If you haven't really received it, then you aren't going to be able to keep up the facade of caring very long.  In fact, that's called doing it in the flesh and not the Spirit.

I need more of the Father and I need more of those who are seeking Him with their whole hearts.  I need the fellowship of those who are seeking to provide customer service to the world we are living in.  They aren't getting enough of it...even from Christian businesses.  Join with me and let's change that.

Unique

This week during a leadership class I had the opportunity to speak for 2 minutes on a topic that was suggested.  We'd talked about the breakup of the Soviet Union, taxes and a variety of other topics.  Mine came up when we began to talk about how the educational system was geared toward manufacturing students.

Early in my life of following Christ I came across the familiar Proverb about training up a child in the way they should go and when they are old they won't depart from it.  For me, it was like cramming me in a box that I didn't fit in and expecting me to stay there for the rest of my life...especially if it was "beaten" into me.

But I have seen another interpretation that I believe more reflects the heart of God.  And I wish I had done a better job of raising my kids this way.  That is, to discover the unique way my Father created me, my kids and everyone around me, bless that uniqueness and then encourage it in any way that I can.  I wish the church was doing a better job of that method but that's for another blog.

So how did we get to where we are in the eduction system in America?  We were once an agrarian society based on the farm.  We lived together as extended families, worked side by side with those with the same DNA and learned life and our skill set from them.  As we transitioned into the industrial era we needed to adapt people to a rigid schedule, arriving at the same time each morning to do the same task alongside others moving in the same direction. 

On the farm that wasn't necessary.  It didn't matter when you did your chores each day.  Your schedule and the creative way you fulfilled your duties didn't really interfere with anyone else except those you lived with.  But you can't run a factory with people showing up at different times.  Everyone has to be there at the same time and work until the same time each day to be able to run an assembly line.

The school system was born about this time...to educate people in how to all show up at the same time and do the same task each day.  (See Toffler's The Third Wave for more on this)

We started in that manufacturing mentality and we're still stuck in it, I don't care how much you tout what we are doing as a new program.  No Child Left Behind just focused the outcome on manufacturing students to build the same thing...answers to a standardized test.

But we are unique...each one of us.  We learn differently.  At least three ways according to the "experts"...visually, auditorilly and kinetically.  We learn by seeing, by hearing and by doing.  So how do we stick a pile of kids (and the pile is getting bigger in each classroom as cutbacks occur) in a classroom and teach them all the same way successfully?  We don't.  Add to that the fact that we have "gifted" students, students with IEPs (Individual Educational Plans) and those who don't demand attention on either end of the spectrum and get lost in the middle.

I heard about a book this week called Organization for Creative People (don't quote me on that title-it's something like that) that was written so you could pick up the book, start in any chapter and read any chapter next.  I loved it.  It reminds me of Pat and how she would read the end of the book before she read other parts of it to see if it was worth reading.  That was like scratching on a blackboard to me.  I've got to read the Foreword, Introduction, Preface and Chapter 1 all in the right order.  GOSH!

One of my colleagues in the class told how her two oldest were sons and they excelled in academics.  Her daughter, however, was cut out of a different mold.  She announced to her mother that she was a "C" student at best and don't expect her to do any better.  Oh, did I say she was 13 when she announced this?  Well, she didn't let that hold her back.  She started a dance studio in their basement.  Got the parents to sign contracts and pay her money to teach their children.  Hired a dance instructor out of the money and a backup in case she couldn't be there.  The parents came to the house and by passed the mom to see the daughter about their child's dancing lessons.  I told the mom...don't change anything!  You are doing it right.

Another colleague added the comment that education really should start in the home and be done primarily by the parents.  That sounds like a revolutionary idea (and one that's been around before--think farm life from above).

How long are we going to try to manufacture people--in the home, the schools and the work place?  When are we going to treat each one as an individual, discover with the help of the Father their unique place in life and encourage that so that they can fulfill the calling God has on them?  We are not all alike and the world needs all of us in our unique way to contribute to the well-being of others.  PS I love all of my friends--left-wing tree huggers and right wing wackos.

Are your kids different from other kids you know?  Is your spouse different than you are?  Are your co-workers and neighbors cut out of the same pattern?  Can we make them all alike?  God help us...not to!

Take time to find out what makes each person around you unique.  Celebrate their uniqueness.  Encourage them to explore and test the limits of their gifting and abilities.  And rejoice with the Father in how all of us are unique.

OUR

I've been kinda quiet for the last several weeks.  Nothing has stirred my writing juices...until yesterday.

I don't know if you saw it but there was an article in the papers recently about $16 cupcakes for a Department of Justice conference.  I didn't hear the newscast but apparently Fox News picked up on it until the mistake was corrected.  It was $16 per person and that included several other things than just cupcakes for each person.  That gave my left wing liberal friends an opportunity to blast the Republicans and Fox News, et al for their coverage of it.  That got my juices to flowing.

First off, its not too far fetched to think of $16 cupcakes for the government.  It's common to pay $20 a dozen or $3.25 each for cupcakes in DC.  After reading the GAO Guide on Estimating it's not uncommon in the government to blow a budget of any kind by billions.  Poor estimating.  Couldn't have done that for very long when I was working in home building.  And our government can't afford to do it for very much longer.

So the point is not whether the government can do things better, watch their money more closely and stop expecting that taxing the wage earners will help them with their addiction for spending.  The point is its not whether we have a Republican or Democratic government in place.  It happens on both watches.

I am a registered...does it really matter?  I have right wing conservative friends and relatives who live by Fox News, Bill O'Reilly and Glenn Beck.  I have left wing liberal tree hugger friends and relatives who listen to NPR, believe in global warming and wouldn't think of using a plastic bag to bring their groceries home.  It really doesn't matter.

What lights my fire is all the postings on FB and other emails that devote time to blasting the other side as if that will solve the problem.  Folks...that is a waste of time and a pseudo appearance of doing something that matters.  Let's make things straight.  None of the politicians of either party can get the job done.  They're spending all their energy shooting at each other rather than addressing the problems that need cures.

If case you have forgotten, regardless of your favorite news media, political persuasion or punching bag, we are all Americans, citizens of the same country.  When the government spends ridiculous amounts of money to send to a dictator who pockets it instead of helping his countrymen, when the Defense Department overshoots their budget for a new weapons system by billions, when unscrupulous doctors bill Medicare for unfounded charges in the millions of dollars, they are wasting OUR money.  It is the tax dollars that WE working persons have sent to our government.

They have a fiduciary responsibility to us to spend it wisely and to care for those who deserve to have the help of all the rest of us.  It is not the Republicans' money or the Democrats' money.  It is OUR money.  When it is spent unwisely, just plain wasted or fraudulently used they are wasting money that you and I and thousands of other hard working Americans gave to them for safekeeping.

By the way, Rick Perry was right.  The Social Security system is a Ponzi scheme not a guaranteed investment that we are sure to reap the benefits of.  By the way, Hillary Clinton was right.  It takes a village to raise a child and no government, Christian school or educational system is going to be able to do that for us.

We must let our voices be heard...by both parties and all aspects of government.  We as tax payers need to become angry about the whole mess and ask for accountability in getting the government straightened out.  It is going to take bold leadership--and it doesn't matter which party it comes from--to help us change the culture of taxing and spending and wasting precious resources on things that don't work.  And the blame game doesn't work either.

We need to become people of action.  I'm now a government employee.  I'm a long way from the workings of our legislature except they fund the department I am a part of.  What can I do?  I can push back to those other employees I am working with when they ask me to spend unnecessary money on a project.  I can personally not walk up to the end of the budget year trough and order supplies that I don't need.  I can be conservative in my spending when I am on government paid travel.

What can you do?  Write your Congressmen and Senators, regardless of your party affiliation and theirs, and demand that they use fiscal responsibility in their spending.  We can waste money on a social welfare program just as quickly as we can waste it on a weapons system.  Write the President and tell him you want to stop the addiction the government has to money.  And most important of all, stop wasting time criticizing the other "side" for their politics.  It's OUR government, yours and mine.  It's OUR money.  It's OUR future and the future of our children.  Take action that really matters.

Me first

Stressful situations always bring out the real person behind the façade.  That is if it has been hidden.  In today’s world people just let it all hang out most of the time anyway.

Last Tuesday, DC suffered an earthquake.  Several persons on my floor are assigned the task of floor monitors to make sure everyone got out safely.  When the building started rocking and rolling…they all left.  It was survival of the fittest or “I’m taking care of me first!”

The days since the earthquake have seen several persons expressing their fears and inability to face the possibility of a catastrophe.  They are vowing to abandon the building more quickly the next time and not to hesitate as long as they did.  They don’t expect anyone else to watch out for them.  It’s me who has to protect me.

The afternoon of the quake the Metro was loaded.  The platform of the station was packed.  More kept coming in and jamming the already tight space even tighter.  It was more telling when the trains arrived.  There was no thought of stepping aside for others or letting those who have been waiting the longest go first.  It was whomever could force their way to the front could get on.  The rest of you can wait.

I was with a colleague from my office.  In the course of the conversation I suggested in jest to him that he could make a hole for me and I would rush on the train.  (He was quite a bit bigger than me)  But we both soon realized that we weren’t aggressive enough to force others, men and women alike, to the side so we could get to the front.  The results were that we waited for 90 minutes and didn’t get on a train until the third one came.

We finally made our way to the front of the platform and, without knocking someone down, boarded a train.  It was tight to say the least.  The windows were fogged up from the heat of all the passengers.  There were no seats and very little room to stand in.  I had to hold my lunchbox over my head to make as much room as I could.  We were definitely up close and personal with total strangers.

Every station we approached had a full platform with many others who wanted to join us on the train.  Here’s where it gets interesting.  When the doors opened they forced their way on the train and it really didn’t matter if there was room for them or not.

At one station several persons (can’t say ladies and gentlemen; they were more like cows) got on pressing others out of their way.  Well, really they were just mashing in more tightly with all the rest of us occupying the space.  One young lady complained that she was being crushed and it was hurting.  The other young woman she spoke to said “sorry” like “too bad so sad”.  The first young lady responded that she could have waited for another train.  Her thoughtful reply, “Tell that to the other 20 who just got on.”

So much for civility.  It’s back to the Garden of Eden.  If you are being hurt it isn’t my fault…it’s them.  I’m not responsible for my behavior when others are doing just as bad or worse.

Mob mentality.  Blame it on someone else.  It’s not my fault.  I have no personal responsibility for your discomfort.

Check that, followers of Christ.  We are each held accountable for our behavior.  We can’t take a “Get out of Jail” card from another player.  We are responsible for our actions and can’t blame the government, society or any body else for our behavioral issues.

I almost got off the train so that others could get on.  I didn’t want to be a part of that behavior.  Only problem…I don’t think I could have gotten to the door.

We each need to step up to the plate, accept our responsibility, repent of our sins and allow the Holy Spirit to work through us to be change-agents in the world we are in.  If we continue to step back and take a passive position we are going to go down with the rest of our culture into the abyss of abject selfishness.  It will truly be “every man/woman/child for themselves.”  I don’t think I want to be around when it gets to that.

Watch today for opportunities to come in the opposite spirit of the world.  Become others-centered.  Model a Christ-like attitude in all you do.  The world is watching for someone to show them the way.

Offended

I’m not good at being politically correct…at least based on what I know of it.  When you are politically correct you don’t say something that will offend someone.  For instance, you don’t call a person who has a same-sex partner a derogatory name.  You call them a homosexual or a lesbian.  You don’t ask a woman who may just be overweight if she is pregnant.

Politically correct behavior has seemed to morph into something even broader than what you call someone.  For instance, kids are being taught in many places that there are no winners and no losers.  It doesn’t matter if that doesn’t square with the real world.

In the real world your behavior is going to be judged and your value to the organization where you are employed is going be evaluated.  You will most likely have to perform in a manner measured against some standards if you want to keep your job.

But in spite of that I still hear “politically correct” talks that seem to be aimed at making sure someone isn’t offended by what is said.  I heard the other day in a presentation about a new initiative that just because the initiative has been introduced doesn’t mean that the employees haven’t been doing a great job so far.

If that’s true, what’s the point of the new initiative?  If the old way of doing things is working across the board and producing the results you want why do you need a new initiative?  If it isn’t working, aren’t you allowed to say so and expect that the behaviors of those you employ to change?

While not politically correct, it seems that it would be more truthful to say that the customer service of our organization (put in the name of your company, church or organization) isn’t up to par and we need to change how we are relating to our customers.  We are failing to meet their expectations of good service.  In fact, they are rating us as offering poor service.

That might offend someone who thinks from their own perspective that they are doing a great job even if they aren’t.  So whose perspective prevails?  The person who is leading the organization who feels that the performance of his employees isn’t up to par or the employee who isn’t in touch with reality and feels that he/she is doing a great job when they are falling short of the goal?

And tell me something, would you change your behavior if someone didn’t “offend” you occasionally to let you know that you weren’t measuring up or that some behavior of yours was not producing the results you want?

What is the root of the offense people take at things?  It’s an indication of your woundedness.  If someone says something that trips your trigger it probably has something to do with a past wound, some way in which another person spoke cutting words to you that wounded your soul.  If you haven’t had the opportunity to know God in that place in your life the wound can still be painfully touched by unsuspecting others.

That’s the point.  If I say something unsuspecting to another with no intent to offend and they get offended have I committed a sin?  Is there anything I can do to change that person’s response? 

All we can do is ask forgiveness for any way that we have offended someone.  This opens the door for the Holy Spirit to bring conviction to that person.  It isn’t our responsibility.  We might, if they ask, have the opportunity to speak truthfully to them in love about their sensitivity.

Confronting them about their woundedness probably won’t result in a positive outcome.  It will just trigger defensiveness.  Most of us don’t realize when we are reacting in offense to something someone else has said we aren’t responding to them but to the original person who caused the offense wound in our hearts.

I’m very experienced in offending people.  I believe that is because the Father wants me to be quick to repent and provide the atmosphere for Him to work in the hearts of those I offend.  It also has to do with the fact my gifting is in the direction of the prophetic.  Do I particularly like this calling?  Not really but my Father has so worked in my life that I am willing to lay down my “life” and not make excuses for why I have offended someone so that they may experience real life as well.

What if?

Surprisingly, being in Washington doesn't involve much conversation about what is going on in government...at least from a budget standpoint.  We just keep moving forward even though the government doesn't have money and we aren't sure we are going to get a paycheck.

But as I sat in traffic this week I thought about something.  What if...

Part of the struggles of government is how to fund all the entitlements that people expect.  The government is just a big cash cow, right?  Who is the government by the way?  It's us.  We the taxpayers.  Those of us who make X dollars but only bring home Y dollars after every entity gets their share.  By the way, although I don't live in DC I realized this week they are taking out DC taxes from my pay.  I learned it is the default when they don't have a specific tax authority specified.  Funny, nobody told me that and now I have to try to recover over $700 because PA is going to want that money.

Anyway, back to my thoughts.  How did the government end up with this burden that requires all of us to fund it?  When I go back to writings about the early church I see that the widows and orphans were to be taken care of by the body of Christ.  The poor were to be provided for by the local assembly as they could.  All things we in common in the church of Acts.  If someone, even another gathering of believers had needs they just sought help from another local assembly.

So what happened?  Why are we so far from that today?  What if...all those who profess to follow Christ would contribute their tithe to helping those in need?  Let's just start in the body of Christ.  Do you know a brother or sister who could use your help?  Do you fail to give because if it isn't to a 501(c)3 organization who can give you a tax write-off you'll miss the tax benefits?  How much wealth could the body of Christ amass to help those in need if we all gave our tithe?

Another element of this ministry by the body is that of accountability.  The scripture says if you don't work you don't eat.  Could we, if we were in a relationship with a brother or sister in Christ, say to them that they need to contribute their labors somewhere even if we have to be helping them with their finances?  I've wondered as I've walked past homeless people in DC...why don't they start giving by picking up the trash in the city rather than just laying under a tree expecting a handout?  I'm not being calloused.  We all have something to give back.  It always makes me feel better about things when I feel that I'm doing something that contributes to the betterment of the world.

Should we just expect the government to be helping people with the needs in their lives?  What about helping those who are wounded emotionally and seek drugs to soothe the pain?  Does a government handout help them with their pain?  Or women who are seeking comfort and love turning to multiple partners and birthing multiple fatherless children?  Can we help them not only financially through the church but also emotionally?  Can we help them to see how much the Father loves them so that they don't need to try to find it in bed with some other man?

What if...the church were being the church rather than just taking up space on street corners with buildings?  What if all the members of local assemblies were contributing their gifts and resources, however meager, to the meeting of needs?  I would think we could make an impact in each of our communities that would make headlines.  The noise might even be heard around the world.  How long are we going to sit back and expect the government to do the loving thing that the church was called to do in the first place?

Want to reduce the deficit we all face?  Start by giving what you can, loving who you see and contributing the power of the Spirit to those without.  Don't just say "bless you" and go away, but become engaged in their lives.  It's messy but I believe it would be exciting to see just what the church could do with the ministry they have given up to the government by default.

What if...

Savin Time

Everyone in the city is in a hurry.  Nosing into traffic if there is the slightest gap.  Pushing to get "there" before anyone else does.  Walking fast.  Elbowing their way through a crowd.

What's all the rush for?  Where are they going that they need to save nano-seconds in their trip?  And when they get there are they going to be able to engage with those they are with or will they have to unwind and relieve the stress, staying focused on how tired they are from the grueling commute?

It doesn't seem worth it to me.  In fact, as I've written before, I'm finding it far less stressful to avoid being in such a rush.  I just let them go on by.  Besides, I'm finding that I get to see things they are missing.  I leave a little earlier, step aside when they are pushing in and, this is the hardest one, go ahead and let them nose in ahead of me in traffic.

Some actions just don't seem worth the effort.  I saw a woman last week going back and forth between two lanes of traffic, neither of which were moving.  She must have been bored just sitting in a straight line.  Or else it was a reaction to the stress.  Can't relax.  Can't miss an opportunity to get three more feet closer to...wherever she is rushing to go.

The one that took the cake happened the other day on the Metro.  During rush hour trains come every 4 minutes or so.  That's not a very long wait but people rush down the stairs to make sure they get down to the platform.  They rush to the end of the train closest to the stairs when they exit at their stop.  They take risks to make sure they get that train and don't have to wait.

The other day a woman actually stuck her arm and leg in the doors of the Metro to keep them from closing.  They aren't like elevator doors.  They don't pop back open when they hit you.  They just clamp shut.  She was stuck in there with her bags out on the platform asking for help to get the doors open...just so she didn't have to wait for 4 more minutes.

I guess the rush is what contributes to the lack of connection in the city.  I pass literally hundreds of people each day and few take the time to look me in the eye and greet me.  I'm making it a habit to do that.  To say hello.  To smile and to give people, even those who push in front of me, a kind expression to ease their day.

Take a minute to greet someone today.  Even those who don't seem to have the time to greet you.  Make eye contact.  Wish them a good day...or better yet...bless them.  Get to know those you see every day.  Call them by name.  They are valuable in the sight of God.  Deeply loved and in need of your smile and greeting today.

Mainstream

The concept of God-fearers has always intrigued me in the scriptures.  It leads us to the fact that there are people who’s hearts are attuned to God but who may not be a part of a faith community.  My guess is that many of them have not ventured into a church because of the lack of conventionality of their faith.  It doesn’t fit the Christian church world.

I’m also reminded of the way in which my faith has been challenged over the years in various settings.  The first of those was college.  I did not drink alcoholic beverages.  As a member of a fraternity I was in the microscopic minority of those who didn’t.  I defended my position until it became apparent to me that my reasoning for not consuming didn’t get two minutes worth of attention from those around me.

My time in the navy was also an eye-opener as I have written before.  I was faced with questions and assertions by Mormons, those practicing voodoo, metaphysicians, radical right wing Christians and others who were embracing the homosexual lifestyle.  My Baptist theology wasn’t deep enough to help me encounter the questions of those I met.

Several things came into my life to impact that.  I have written about the impact of Francis Schaeffer and his philosophic approach to the truth of the Gospel.  It enabled me to be in conversation with those who didn’t adhere to mainstream Christianity.  I’ve also been enabled to dialogue with those in the main stream of our culture as I have found the reality of God in my own emotional life’s healing.  I am convinced in a very experiential way that God is real and He and I are in relationship.

I remember writing once during a goal setting exercise when I was pastoring that I would like to study the unchurched, have more interaction with them and find out what brought them to their place of faith or lack of it.

Now I find myself immersed in that world.  I am no longer working for a self-confessed Christian business.  I am not surrounded with others who have been attracted to their employer by his or her statement of faith.  In fact, I’m in an environment where I have to be somewhat careful of “pushing” my faith on others.  I don’t have a problem with that.  I like the natural way of conversing anyway.  Tracts and confrontive evangelism have never been my style.

What of those who have never been exposed to the Gospel in any kind of organized form?  What of those who have unfortunately had a negative encounter with those of Christian faith?  Who reaches those who would never darken the door of a church to further their faith?  What of those who, if given the chance, say that they are without faith of any kind in God?  Would we ever have occasion to have conversation with them about the Gospel?

We need to be in the world.  We need to be daily interacting with others who may not have a traditional faith.  We need to have communities (notice I didn’t say church—I’m not talking about a building with organized programs) where faith can be questioned.  Where a relationship with God can be sorted out.  Where we can court the Father before we commit our lives to following Him. 

I want to be there.  Right in the middle of the mixing pot.  I want to be on the mount sharing my heavenly Father with those who are searching for truth and seeking for life…and that to the full.  There is a deep hunger in our culture for something of meaning.  Too much of life is being lived by those who are just existing.  Then there is the other extreme of those who are living life by amassing as many toys as they can to flavor life and make it all worthwhile.

I haven’t found either of those in my relationship with the Father.  I have found a richness and fullness of life and joy.  I want others to have the opportunity to experience that.  It’s without cost—at least monetarily. 

Tolerance

Tolerance is a word I have most often heard in relation to mechanical tolerances.  The Japanese have long been known for their close tolerances in their mechanical parts.  That's part of what makes them last so long.  Compare the engine of a Model T to one in a Lexus.  It's hard to believe they are both the same kind of machine.  The closer tolerances of the Lexus make the engine purr rather than rattle and clank like the Model T.

In more recent days I have heard tolerance used as a way to describe my feelings toward those who are not like me.  I am, being politically correct, to be tolerant of those who have a different lifestyle than mine.  Funny how many times those persons aren't tolerant of where I am.

So does God just call us to be tolerant of people?  That seems so negative.  Like I just can't hardly stand to be with someone but I'll suck it up and make the best of it.  Hopefully, it won't last long.  I'm sure when I am being merely "tolerant" that the other person is able to pick that up.  My smile is fake and they know it.  Trust me, God doesn't need us to "act" tolerant.

What I've found as the Father has healed my heart is that I am more genuinely tolerant of others.  I'm even patient with their dysfunction, not just tolerant of it.  I'm even compassionate of the place they find themselves in.

What changed all that?

When I was hurting so badly I couldn't think of any one else but me.  I was in pain so I needed all the attention and sympathy I could get.  My pain was sticking out all over so I didn't have more than a second or two of tolerance for someone else's behavior.  Wow!  Sounds a lot like a 2 year old.

As the Father has healed my wounds I have found that I have more compassion for the misbehaviors, if you will, of others.  I see people in the traffic here in DC with microseconds of patience with the other vehicles and their drivers.  It's hard not to judge them but as I remember and am reminded by the Holy Spirit I pray for them and bless them.  They are hurting and don't have the capacity to give others room in their lives...or room in their lane of traffic.

As I have come to know the Father more intimately I have relaxed a whole bunch.  Talk to those who know me well (my wife).  I'm not the same person...and no, it's not the medication I'm on.

It's because I know I don't have to fight for space in this world.  I am a child of my Father.  He loves me.  He cares for me.  He is with me wherever I go.  He comforts me.  He has great patience with me.  He has tolerated me in my sin for a long time.  As I receive His love, experience His patience with me and know how He feels about me as one of His children I can love others.  I can give them the grace they need.  I can demonstrate the love of the Father for them.  I can have mercy when they are so wounded that they can't think of any one else.

That clanking engine in the Model T reminds me of the scripture in Corinthians that says that without love we are like a clanging bell.  Not a pleasant sound.

Let me suggest you stop trying to "love" or be "tolerant" of others.  Your efforts are going to come across as fake to those who hurt.  Stop long enough to let the Father love you, heal your wounds and pour grace on your wounded soul.  Then your "tolerance" will come across as that Lexus and will purrrrrrrr....right into the heart of the one you are loving.

Is it OK?

It's a small world.  Friends of mine were recently in Rehobeth for some vacation.  One of the friends knows how to speak PA Dutch.  She gets a kick out of finding someone like Amish people who are out of their element, saying something to them in Dutch and watching their reaction.

That happened.  She spoke to the husband of the couple and they struck up a conversation.  In the course of the conversation my friend realized that this Amish couple may know me because they have a store in Spartensburg, PA.  She mentioned my name and the wife's eyes lit up.  They were off to the races then.

My Amish friends are a wonderful couple and I enjoyed visiting them when I made my rounds in their area as I sold fabric.  My visits weren't all just about how much fabric I could sell.  They got into the personal.  The spiritual.  The real part of my customers' lives.

The same was true with this couple.  We talked often about our relationship with the Father and what He was doing in the world.

Of course, they wanted to know where I was.  My other English friends told them about my job in Washington, DC with the Veterans Affairs.  They were a bit surprised and suggested that maybe since I was spiritual that it was unusual to find me here.

So where are Christians supposed to be?  What are we supposed to be?  Last time I checked we were to be in the world but not of the world.  We are to be salt and light wherever we go.  Can I do that working for the government?  Certainly.  I am a child of the King wherever I find myself.

Are there needy hearts in Washington?  Are their needy hearts on the Metro each morning and evening?  Are there needy hearts in my office?

Haven't had any trouble finding them so far!

What are we as Christians supposed to be doing in the world?  We are to serve.  We are to love.  We are to be available where the Holy Spirit needs us to be.  As we love we create an atmosphere where people can smell the scent of the Father.  As we serve we are ambassadors for Christ.  As we give of ourselves we usher in the presence of the Holy Spirit so He can speak to hearts and woo those around us.

We can also do just the opposite.  We can create static by our inconsistencies and aid the enemy by our lack of integrity.  Someone told me this weekend about a fellow who attended church diligently, came to football practice where he was the coach with his suit on, fresh from church...and proceeded to curse the players out with language that would make a sailor blush.  My guess is that his testimony wasn't met with awe but rather disgust.

When I was pastoring in Mountville, PA I used to go into the local bar across the street every morning to get my paper.  They came to know me during my ever so brief stops and eventually called me Father Murphy.  Some time later someone came to interview me about my pastorate and they made the comment that they would never darken the door of a bar.  It just wasn't the right thing for a Christian to do.  Are we to leave the dark places to the enemy and hide in the light?  Or are we to take the light into the dark places?

Seems simple but we get sidetracked so easily.  God is calling all of us who profess to be followers of Christ to serve and to love wherever we find ourselves.  It's okay to be salt and light in dark places.  It's good for us to press forward into battle in the territory of the enemy wherever you think that might be.

My Father hasn't called me to be a judge of the world but a lover of the people of the world so He can reach them.  It's OK.  I'm under cover for the Father.  How about you?

Eyes to See

I had a unique experience last November...at least unique to me.  I had someone sit down with me, go over my resume, probe me about my experiences in life and encourage me to aim higher.  That person was my sister-in-law.  It's not that she is one of my best and oldest friends.  In fact, we could be said to have hardly knew each other before that encounter.

Then a few weeks later she was at our home over Thanksgiving with a host of others in the family.  In one of those roundtable family discussions we got to talking about business and eventually ended up on the government.  I've heard families should avoid the topics of religion and politics but I find that the discussions can be very stimulating and fun.  My sister-in-law began to share some of the things she had seen while on temporary assignment with the VA in Washington DC.

She wasn't critical as we can be so often, coming up with things that are wrong but not offering solutions.  Instead she cast a vision of what could be.  When that starts happening I get excited.  I begin to see possibilities.  Opportunities for things to run smoother.  A chance for an organization to serve their clientele better.  I like to be right in the middle of those things.  I know.  Many of you have listened to me wrestle with the things I am trying to align.  Thank you for being patient with me.  It's who I am.

Now I find myself four weeks into working in the VA.  I have seen enough to keep me busy for months if not years.  Just as exciting is to find that there are many who are equally excited and passionate about seeing the government be more efficient, save more money and serve the veterans more effectively.  There are people who really care and see that they can make a difference...and want to.

Some of you see the beauty in flowers (so do I).  Others see the beauty of seeing things work well and jobs made more pleasant because we can meet expectations of others who come to us for help.

This week I was in project management class.  After the initial ice was broken the ideas got to cooking.  I heard many stories laced with sadness of how the departments these individuals came from around the country were not performing up to par.  They were frustrated.  Not because they wanted their jobs to be easier but because they saw what they could be doing were obstacles removed from their path.  They saw that the ultimate goal of their jobs was to serve the veterans who had served our country.

What do you see?

Whatever you see is what God has called you to do something about.  He doesn't give us vision to see things we can't touch.  He gives us eyes to see what He has gifted us to do.  If you see a piece of paper on the ground in a parking lot, do you lament the fact that someone dropped it and didn't care?  Do you think something critical about the person who is assigned to keep the lot clean?  Or do you bend over, pick it up and take it to a trash receptacle?

Do you see someone in your circle of friends hurting, lacking someone to listen or needing a smile or act of compassion?  What can you do about what you see?  Act on it.  "But I'm not qualified...or trained...or whatever."  But you have seen it and if you step out in faith God will provide what you need to act on it.  He didn't give you eyes to see something only to walk away in frustration unable to do anything about it.

So often in a situation we criticize the "leadership" or "management" or our "pastor" or those in authority over us for their lack of leadership, for not getting the job done.  Rather than demonstrate what leadership looks like we sit back and criticize.  Rather than pick up the broom and start sweeping, we look for someone else to handle it.  We can't change those who lead us but we can do what we see before us that needs doing.  We can perform the tasks and acts of mercy that our eyes see.

We can make a commitment to change our behavior.  God gave us eyes to see so we can act.

I'm going to speak out with passion because I see a vision of what can be.  I'm going to act on what I see because I can't expect someone else to do it if I'm not willing.  I can lead by example.  I'm going to encourage others who are seeing to act on what is before them.  Rally the troops.  Who knows.  At some point the tipping point might come and things might change.  What will we be seeing then? 

Running

Pat and I have been running from the city.  Well, I guess I can't speak for Pat but it is true for me.

I came to that realization the other night when I was talking with someone.  In spite of all the movement and activity in DC I am still able to hear my heart and what the Father is revealing to me.

I have been hiding in the country and semi-rural areas.  It was safe for me.  I wasn't asked to do more than I could do.  The people were easy to get along with.  I felt like I could handle any relationship that I came across.

My fear was that if I got in an urban setting that it would be revealed that I wasn't all that sharp.  That I wasn't able to run with "the big boys".  That intelligent people would see me as a nave.  It isn't that I haven't been around sharp people all my life or been unable to have a deep intellectual conversation with many of you reading this post.  It's just that I assumed that you were "nicer" because you lived in the country and that people in the city were just mean.

It was only the encouragement of a friend that helped me risk the attempt to fit in some place where there weren't a lot of trees or cows.

What I'm finding is that people are all alike...and that God is with me wherever I go...and I am able to be just who I am in whatever setting I find myself.

This week I have continued to ride the metro, walk down streets lined with tall buildings and I've still been able to be courteous, loving people, listening to them and being me.  I fit.  I fit in better than I ever thought I would.  It even feels comfortable.

There are nice people everywhere.  They respond to nice and genuine interest in them from someone else.  All I have to do is be me.  It gives them the freedom to be them.  The conversations are lively.  We're having fun teasing each other but there are still opportunities to talk about what matters.

This week I had a brief conversation with one of my office mates about Congressman Weiner.  We had just learned that he had resigned.  A co-worker said, "What difference did it make that he was sexting?  If we looked into every politicians life we would find things that were inappropriate."  My reply was that the character of a person is reflected in his actions both privately and publicly.  I believe it's time for us to expect people to take responsibility for their brokenness, get help and realize that it impacts every aspect of their lives including their ability to lead in the public sector.

So I was afraid that I couldn't speak my mind in that setting.  Funny how fears keep us from doing what we need to do...what we have been called to do.  The setting doesn't matter.  The relationship we are speaking out of does.

The Father is in DC with me just like he was in Holmes Co with me.  The geographic location, the mode of transportation and the speed at which people go about their lives doesn't change who He is and my relationship with Him.

What have you been running from?  Is there a calling that you don't feel you measure up to?  What fears are keeping you from being who God created you to be?  I know answers to those questions will bring some renewed excitement to your lives.  Count on it.